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Thread: Trusting People

  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Just A Girl View Post
    it's funny that this has come up now as this is something I've been mulling over the majority of this week. I am very trusting to those people that I allow to be close to me. But once THAT trust is broken, I just don't know how it's ever completely repaired. I guess it's a bit like a beautiful vase, once it's broken, you can glue it back together but you might have to turn it around so no one can see the big crack, but you know it's never quite as pristine as it once was. I read something that said to forgive truly, you have to forget and I don't know how to do that when someone you trust without boundaries betrays that trust.
    well said! that is exactly how I feel. a relationship is forever altered when trust is broken...you can still forgive someone while at the same time recognizing that things will never ever be as it was.

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  3. #22
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    I tow a fine line here. I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I believe that people are truely good and that evil things that are done typically have some reason (maybe not justification) that can be possible explained or understood. I find that if I can understand the reason and live in their shoes for that moment, I may be able to come to terms with the action. I may not have done the same thing as them, but understanding the reasoning is the first step in moving forward in my opinion.

    Trust is very very tough with me. Although I give the benefit of the doubt, I tend not to fully trust. I've been in the online world for several years and there is a reason I never really got that close to anyone. Then I met my princess and that changed. She has shown me how to trust and believe that someone can truely have your best intentions in mind. We've had bumps and moments to get through, but again understanding is key here. It takes alot for a person who has been hurt or wronged to take a step back and try to understand why. But I have found that if the other person is willing to let you into that reasoning, and take the time to explain their actions, you can usually move forward and repair. Do I hold grudges? Nah, not really. I don't wish harm on people that have done me wrong, but I certainly am not giving them keys to anything I own very easily. I forgive, but I may not ever forget. But, there is a difference between forgetting the action and the fact that it occurred, and forgetting the feelings that came with that action. If you can forget those feelings, then you can move on.

    I have to admit, that when I first joined this site, I had some reservations. As much as I trusted my princess, I also had to learn to trust that the other people here are good and would respect our relationship. It took a little for me to get there, but I have. And honestly, it is ultimately the trust that my princess would not allow someone to come into our bubble, just like I would not.
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    Some people are just plain old full of s.h.i.t. Don't take anyone online at their word. Its that simple. And what's funny is, that the people who claim to have been burned by trust are the least trustworthy themselves.
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  5. #24
    Tgirl is offline Flirts N Friends
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    almost forgot the donuts! :) - doncpa figured I would send something different this time..give this a lick ;) - doncpa they didn't have soup here - but you probably like this better anyways - doncpa so I read quotes from the book while you sit on my lap.  ;) - doncpa Happy Easter! - doncpa 
    Good Morning! :) - doncpa Enjoy your trip! - doncpa Cause I'm hungry for pretzels..lol - doncpa Headache, go away!!! - Lucky Just cause! - Lucky 
    :) - johnstubbleton does this help? - doncpa Because you need to stay caffeinated... - doncpa Good Morning - cypher This will cool down the heat. - TwinkleToez 
    Some coffee for you - Enjoy! - doncpa Good Morning! - doncpa Good morning sweetie! - doncpa I know you don't come here much - but hi anyway! - doncpa Because I miss her... - Erdr1ck 
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    Quote Originally Posted by Just A Girl View Post
    it's funny that this has come up now as this is something I've been mulling over the majority of this week. I am very trusting to those people that I allow to be close to me. But once THAT trust is broken, I just don't know how it's ever completely repaired. I guess it's a bit like a beautiful vase, once it's broken, you can glue it back together but you might have to turn it around so no one can see the big crack, but you know it's never quite as pristine as it once was. I read something that said to forgive truly, you have to forget and I don't know how to do that when someone you trust without boundaries betrays that trust.
    Quote Originally Posted by doncpa View Post
    well said! that is exactly how I feel. a relationship is forever altered when trust is broken...you can still forgive someone while at the same time recognizing that things will never ever be as it was.


    Justagirl, Well said. I completely agree with your beautiful vase analogy.

    Don, Also well said, I will add that once my trust is broken I will no longer put you in a "friend" category. I do forgive, but I will NEVER put myself in that position with you again. EVER!

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  7. #25
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    almost forgot the donuts! :) - doncpa figured I would send something different this time..give this a lick ;) - doncpa they didn't have soup here - but you probably like this better anyways - doncpa so I read quotes from the book while you sit on my lap.  ;) - doncpa Happy Easter! - doncpa 
    Good Morning! :) - doncpa Enjoy your trip! - doncpa Cause I'm hungry for pretzels..lol - doncpa Headache, go away!!! - Lucky Just cause! - Lucky 
    :) - johnstubbleton does this help? - doncpa Because you need to stay caffeinated... - doncpa Good Morning - cypher This will cool down the heat. - TwinkleToez 
    Some coffee for you - Enjoy! - doncpa Good Morning! - doncpa Good morning sweetie! - doncpa I know you don't come here much - but hi anyway! - doncpa Because I miss her... - Erdr1ck 
    Adoptee - Bone Cancer - Child Exploitation and Abuse - Hope and Support - Peace - Retinoblastoma - Right to Life - Student Sexual Assault - Tgirl 
    Quote Originally Posted by HerPrince View Post
    I tow a fine line here. I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I believe that people are truely good and that evil things that are done typically have some reason (maybe not justification) that can be possible explained or understood. I find that if I can understand the reason and live in their shoes for that moment, I may be able to come to terms with the action. I may not have done the same thing as them, but understanding the reasoning is the first step in moving forward in my opinion.

    Trust is very very tough with me. Although I give the benefit of the doubt, I tend not to fully trust. I've been in the online world for several years and there is a reason I never really got that close to anyone. Then I met my princess and that changed. She has shown me how to trust and believe that someone can truely have your best intentions in mind. We've had bumps and moments to get through, but again understanding is key here. It takes alot for a person who has been hurt or wronged to take a step back and try to understand why. But I have found that if the other person is willing to let you into that reasoning, and take the time to explain their actions, you can usually move forward and repair. Do I hold grudges? Nah, not really. I don't wish harm on people that have done me wrong, but I certainly am not giving them keys to anything I own very easily. I forgive, but I may not ever forget. But, there is a difference between forgetting the action and the fact that it occurred, and forgetting the feelings that came with that action. If you can forget those feelings, then you can move on.

    I have to admit, that when I first joined this site, I had some reservations. As much as I trusted my princess, I also had to learn to trust that the other people here are good and would respect our relationship. It took a little for me to get there, but I have. And honestly, it is ultimately the trust that my princess would not allow someone to come into our bubble, just like I would not.

    As far as a romantic relationship, trust is the key. Putting things in place that will help with that like walls, barbed wire and locking ourselves in towers has built our relationship. The love we share we have fought for and I trust the prince with my life, love, and pursuit of happiness.

  8. #26
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    Most of the time, my instincts are right but not all the time. I've forgiven people who have lied to me....but they continued to lie and lie and lie.....not everyone is like that. I trust some people to a certain point. I don't have many friends because it's really hard to let them in and trust them but I'm trying.
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    All too often and with disastrous results -- but I continue to do it. I've made it past and through that sort of thing with people who are not in any way egocentric and have helped settle me more firmly into the belief that there still a few good souls out there.
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  10. #28
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    almost forgot the donuts! :) - doncpa figured I would send something different this time..give this a lick ;) - doncpa they didn't have soup here - but you probably like this better anyways - doncpa so I read quotes from the book while you sit on my lap.  ;) - doncpa Happy Easter! - doncpa 
    Good Morning! :) - doncpa Enjoy your trip! - doncpa Cause I'm hungry for pretzels..lol - doncpa Headache, go away!!! - Lucky Just cause! - Lucky 
    :) - johnstubbleton does this help? - doncpa Because you need to stay caffeinated... - doncpa Good Morning - cypher This will cool down the heat. - TwinkleToez 
    Some coffee for you - Enjoy! - doncpa Good Morning! - doncpa Good morning sweetie! - doncpa I know you don't come here much - but hi anyway! - doncpa Because I miss her... - Erdr1ck 
    Adoptee - Bone Cancer - Child Exploitation and Abuse - Hope and Support - Peace - Retinoblastoma - Right to Life - Student Sexual Assault - Tgirl 
    Quote Originally Posted by Georgiagirl View Post
    Most of the time, my instincts are right but not all the time. I've forgiven people who have lied to me....but they continued to lie and lie and lie.....not everyone is like that. I trust some people to a certain point. I don't have many friends because it's really hard to let them in and trust them but I'm trying.
    Yep exactly. When I started my online adventures I was naive enough to think that what said would be held sacred by whoever called me friend. Well that was blown out of the water a couple of times. Taught me a great lesson. I don't mind sharing parts of my life with folks, but I certainly don't expect it to be broadcast to people I don't know in a negative sense. I'm trying to find the balance of not completely distrusting everyone, but to give a little at a time.
    Last edited by Tgirl; 04-29-2013 at 02:03 PM.

  11. #29
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    I trust to easy sometimes. Have been hurt alot before. Talk about put down and but I always to this day try to find good in every one.
    But I also learn that some things is better not share so no one can turn around and use it against you when they are in one
    of there moods. I will let other in my life but still careful in how much information I share with others.


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  12. #30
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    Personally hard for me to trust and open up and this goes back to being young. Of course there are times when I've been burned, but also there have been times when others have picked me up. But overall I would say it takes some time for me to trust.

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