I do though agree wholeheartedly about the element of trust. It is a matter of getting to that point and trusting the person enough to share your dirty little secrets. Then it is a matter of meeting one another's expectations. I do understand myself though and it is probably why I keep friends and foes at arm's length.
Growing up my parents forced me to eat greens. To this day I am banned from 24 golf courses.
I think each situation is different but as long as there is trust, open communication and both are on the same page whether the relationship is private or open to the world shouldnt matter!
Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living!
I have only been in one secret relationship.... and that was one of the stupidest things I ever did.. it wasn't my idea.. I have never been ashamed of who I was involved with... even if I have had some past mistakes.. I learned much from my experiences and in hindsight feel that much of it brings an appreciation being where I am now. One of the things that started it off right is the openness and honesty... not only with each other... but all of it in general. I would never recommend keeping something secret if it truly makes you happy.